Donkey Boners & Other Debauchery

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

It's all about the "O"



Is it just me, or does that girl on the Overstock.com commercial get your cobblers in a tizz? I mean...the all white tennis outfit with her hair in pig-tails? Or how about when she says, "I promise....99% of the time" with the little toss of the hair and the Iwanttoeffyourbrainsout eyes? Even though the auction site doesn't stand a snowball's chance vs. ebay, aces to the men who hired that marketing team.

And while we're on commercials...I'd rather sit on a porcupine than watch another Jamster Cell Phone Ring-tones commercial. Do they really think people want a ring-tone with a shitty imitation of "I like big butts" on their phone? Much less pay 5 bones for it? And I think instead of "I like big butts" it says "I like ring tones and I cannot lie". And then there's the one with the blue rhino rapping, and some yellow bird singing. If I ever see you answer your phone to one of those shitty ass ring tones on the street, your cell phone is finished.


Campisi's in Dallas has been serving up some of the area's best pizzas for years. But I don't know that I've ever seen a Campisi's pie that looked quite this good. (NSFW) Wow.


Four employees of a Michigan based health care company have been fired for refusing to take a test to determine whether they smoke cigarettes. Apparently you will be made redundant if you are caught blazing some chalkies "even if the smoking happens after business hours or at home." Surely this is illegal. I can understand banning cigarettes in the workplace...but testing for cigarette smoking? Better start letting your roommate wring his sock out in your stadium pal and wear that shit at work. NO BUZZ.

I'm sure by now everyone has heard about the man who pissed his way out of an avalanche last week. So tits. Next time I hit the double blacks I'll be sure to carry a pony keg in my pack.

I know you are bored at work, so watch this dude beat Super Mario Bros. 3 in eleven minutes. Un-Fucking-Believable. Brings back memories. *tear*

Top 10 signs you weren't the most popular guy at your high school....by Napoleon Dynamite. So Best. "Everyone's jealous of your teatherball skills"

If you live in Dallas, you might remember Mark Mathis...he was a weatherman for the Fox affiliate here for a short time. Anyway...the dude was fired for being an alkie and always goofing off on camera. And by goofing off I mean rapping. Weather rapping. Painful. Take a look. This is a compilation of his best work from past gigs.

I'm getting my Jeep worked on today. Let's hope the son of a bitch doesn't cost more in repairs than the blue book value. (I'll keep you updated)

I'm out. Don't change.


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