Donkey Boners & Other Debauchery

Monday, September 25, 2006

"People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late."

Do you like to draw, paint, sketch, or doodle?
Then take this enjoyable art test!

I was watching Monday Night Football tonight (go Saints!), and saw the Wrangler Jeans commercial for the millionth time....the one with Junior sporting those horrible fake Oakleys with "The Boys Are Back In Town" playing in the background. I mean, you think Dale Junior would be caught dead in a pair of Wrangler "relaxed fit" jeans? The dude has a stripper pole in the basement of his house. I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be picking up shit in your Wrangler "makes your ass look like an empty grocery sack" jeans. But check out these Dale Junior Jean Shorts available at your local Wal-Mart. Nothing says "Nice Nascar Life" like Dale Junior Jorts. Now hand me an ice-cold Schaefer.

Apparently you can't buy a Falcons #7 jersey with "Mexico" (ala the Michael Vick herps incident) as the last name on it in the NFL FAN SHOP anymore. I'm tempted to buy some iron on letters from Academy.

I love Tony Cornheiser on MNF because he's not afraid to, in a matter of words, tell Joe Theisman to shut the fuck up, or belittle him on camera. Theisman is the ultimate beating when it comes to football announcers.

And how about Ed Hochuli scoreboarding all of the other refs tonight by wearing the XXSmall underarmor-esque referee jersey? I love that guy. I'm pretty sure his biceps are bigger than my thighs. By the way...he's an attorney when he's not doing football. I would hate to see him badger the witness.

I just ate 5/8 of a large Coal Vines pizza. Best pizza in Dallas. Seriously. On my way to a FUPA, Parcells stizz.

KVIL Asswhip Song of the Day: "I can only imagine" by who gives a shit.